How can I set "linked in as" for types that I generate

There may be something I am missing: it looks like you’ve answered your own question! (“If you want to change that name, and you have the necessary permissions, you can change it on that other type.”) I’ll try to break it down, though.

When looking at the schema for a type, you can only edit the properties on that type. The “linked in as” is the name of the reciprocal property on some other type, so you can’t edit that directly; you must visit the other type to change it.

To create a “linked in as,” a reciprocal property, is very simple. Once you have a property from one type to another, go visit the schema for that other type. At the bottom of the schema editor, you will see “Suggested Properties”; these are un-reciprocated incoming properties from other types. If you edit the name of one of those, you have not only picked up a new property with its “linked in as” already set, you have now changed the “linked in as” on the other type.

Please note that the schema editor is being redesigned, so the details of this process (though not the fundamental concepts) may change.

Now, if you don’t have the rights to edit the other type, you’re out of luck. Let’s say you make a private type called Hater with a property called “People Hated” that expects Person. Unless you’re an administrator of the People domain, you can’t reciprocate that property as “Hated By.” And that’s just as well; we don’t want everyone on the system to be able to edit all the types, which is why we have the administrator system in place. If you think that known by whom a person is hated is critical information to the Freebase community, you can ask the People administrators to reciprocate the property, or even to promote your Hater type into their domain.

Does that help? 

That's actually a good way of explaining reciprocal properties.

Do you know how much lag time to expect from the time a property is put up, to when the suggested property appears on the other type?